Love story
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy:No Girl:
Do you like me?
Boy: Not really
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me
Boy: NO
Girl: Choose–me or your life ?
Boy: my life The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says… The reason you never cross my mind is because you’re always on my mind. The reason why I don’t like you is because I love you. The reason I don’t want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn’t cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn’t live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I’m not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
God the Parent
Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to God's kids.After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was: "Don't."
"Don't what?" Adam asked.
"Don't eat the Forbidden Fruit."
God replied."Forbidden fruit? We got Forbidden Fruit? Hey, Eve..we got Forbidden Fruit!""No way!""Where?""Don't eat that fruit!" said God."Why?""Because I am your Creator and I said so!" said God, wondering why he hadn't stopped after making the elephants.A few minutes later God saw the kids having an apple break and was angry."Didn't I tell you not to eat that fruit?" the 'First Parent' asked."Uh huh,"
Adam replied."Then why did you?""I dunno," Eve answered."She started it!"
Adam said."Did not!""DID so!""DID NOT!"Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own...thus the pattern was set, and it has never changed.
Biggest lie
Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"
One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."
"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."
The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher
Teacher: Why are you late?Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
Student: No. I was standing on it.
Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the....
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet